This morning I lost my cool. A little more than lost my cool. More like completely freaked out turned into evil death mom lost my cool.
I’m tired. My sinuses are icky. I have a burn on my arm that morphed over the past few days from just a burn to a case of cellulitis. I’m wiped out.
And Gracie, oh Gracie, my peanut little Gracie would not get dressed this morning. And it seemed the more I yelled, the louder I yelled, the nastier I became….the less inclined she was to do what I wanted.
Frustration mounted, mind spinning, head screaming (me screaming), I completely lost it. Scared the death out of my precious peanut I’m sure. I’m sure a ranting/screaming/raving 28 year old at 5 something in the morning is scary in and of itself. Add to that fact that the ranter/screamer is your mum, well, the scary factor just mounted 3 thousand times.
It turns out, the one thing she responds to, after I screaming/ranting/raving get her dressed myself, is a hug. A long drawn out, teary, I’m so sorry I’m so sorry hug.
And I feel like such a lug now. Such.A.Lug.
I lost my cool this morning, and now I’m trying to find the fortitude within myself to forgive myself for being an idiot.
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A type 1 diabetic mom of Gracie, my 4 year daughter with type 1 diabetes & cerebral palsy and Sandis, my 7 year old son with PDD-NOS (a disorder on the autism spectrum). We are learning to move beyond and not be defined by our diagnoses every single day.
About Me
- Sarah
- Saint Cloud, MN, United States
- Hey All! My name is Sarah! I'm 32 y.o. and living in Saint Cloud, MN. I am married to sexy Bob the Babe who is a drummer extraordinaire. We have three kiddos, Sandis age 8, Gracie age 6, and little Thia Apple age little. We have a few medical conditions in our family, including type 1 diabetes, gastroparesis, mild cerebral palsy, spondylosis, degenerative disc disease, ADD, ADHD, Aspergers/high functioning autism.....The list could go on but you get the idea!
Single Payer, Universal Health Care Info
Health Care/Coverage Costs to Date (5-7-08)
Total (not incl. FSA contr.): $3104.71
Premiums (Health & Dental): $342.00
RX: $175.57
OTC: $30.79
Eyeglasses: $330.43
Therapy (OT & PT): $334.37
Diabetes Education: $112.71
Dental: $69.20
Physician Consultation: $194.46
Labs & Diagnostic: $724.41
Pump Supplies: $110.32
CGM Supplies: $303.56
Outpatient Surgery: $356.92
CADI Waiver Fees: $20.00
FSA: $560
FSA Withdrawn: $21080.00
% of earned income: 36.1%
% of earned + unearned income: 25.1%
Premiums (Health & Dental): $342.00
RX: $175.57
OTC: $30.79
Eyeglasses: $330.43
Therapy (OT & PT): $334.37
Diabetes Education: $112.71
Dental: $69.20
Physician Consultation: $194.46
Labs & Diagnostic: $724.41
Pump Supplies: $110.32
CGM Supplies: $303.56
Outpatient Surgery: $356.92
CADI Waiver Fees: $20.00
FSA: $560
FSA Withdrawn: $21080.00
% of earned income: 36.1%
% of earned + unearned income: 25.1%
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4 comments:
I think those moments make us better parents. Don't beat yourself up too much.
Please take care of the cellulitis. If it's not treated properly it can take a long time to go away. (This is Mn Nice but I couldn't get through on my name.)
Sarah,
It happens to all of us. Sometimes I just had to take a walk. I know you can't do that but know that you're not the only one who has lost it at times.
Kids remember those moments.
It would be best to find a person who you feel comfortable with so as to discuss stresses and frustrations that you are experiencing at times. This would act as a counter against future "outbursts."
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