This morning I lost my cool. A little more than lost my cool. More like completely freaked out turned into evil death mom lost my cool.
I’m tired. My sinuses are icky. I have a burn on my arm that morphed over the past few days from just a burn to a case of cellulitis. I’m wiped out.
And Gracie, oh Gracie, my peanut little Gracie would not get dressed this morning. And it seemed the more I yelled, the louder I yelled, the nastier I became….the less inclined she was to do what I wanted.
Frustration mounted, mind spinning, head screaming (me screaming), I completely lost it. Scared the death out of my precious peanut I’m sure. I’m sure a ranting/screaming/raving 28 year old at 5 something in the morning is scary in and of itself. Add to that fact that the ranter/screamer is your mum, well, the scary factor just mounted 3 thousand times.
It turns out, the one thing she responds to, after I screaming/ranting/raving get her dressed myself, is a hug. A long drawn out, teary, I’m so sorry I’m so sorry hug.
And I feel like such a lug now. Such.A.Lug.
I lost my cool this morning, and now I’m trying to find the fortitude within myself to forgive myself for being an idiot.
Health care is a basic human right, not a privilege. For some reason, we’ve allowed ourselves as Americans to be fooled into accepting that one must be blessed with “means” to actuate appropriate health care. As a nation we have failed to realize that our health care system is a barometer of our society’s value for human life.
-Me
-Me
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
4 comments:
I think those moments make us better parents. Don't beat yourself up too much.
Please take care of the cellulitis. If it's not treated properly it can take a long time to go away. (This is Mn Nice but I couldn't get through on my name.)
Sarah,
It happens to all of us. Sometimes I just had to take a walk. I know you can't do that but know that you're not the only one who has lost it at times.
Kids remember those moments.
It would be best to find a person who you feel comfortable with so as to discuss stresses and frustrations that you are experiencing at times. This would act as a counter against future "outbursts."
Post a Comment