The Blahs and Other Such Things

Maybe it is the weather. Maybe it is the time of year. Maybe it is because I live in cold, humdrum Minnesota where being in the comfortable climate median is more of a fantasy rather than a reality that ever plays itself out. Regardless of the whyevers and whatevers of my blahs, I’ve decided I most certainly have them. Seriously. I ate a chocolate chip cookie dough blizzard yesterday. I reined in the sugars pretty well but woke up this morning at 211. I corrected and metered in at 379 one hour later. WTF? So what, is my body releasing cortisol to make my emotions feel better? Some sort of steroidal anesthetic? Hmmmph. I don’t care WHY or WHAT is causing this but it is PISSING ME RIGHT THE **** OFF.

That being said, I really had a tough week last week. Sandis had his first Kindergarten conferences last Thursday. It did not go so well. Sandis’s teacher wonders if I have ever thought about having Sandis checked for “hyperactivity disorder”. GRRRRRR….

Truth be told, Sandis visited with a psychologist when he was three to be evaluated for the aforementioned disorder. He was handed, on a silver platter no less (not really but it felt that way) with a provisional ADHD diagnosis. Provisional meaning that it was a diagnosis that pended upon his behavior as he grew older. At age 3, it really is very hard to pin ANY child down long enough to effectively evaluate them for something like ADHD.

Following this provisional diagnosis I met with Sandis’s psychologist several times (myself only) learning different parenting techniques to use with Sandis to help him manage his energetic and impulsive tendencies. Over the past few years, Sandis’s behavior has improved exponentially. He is such a smart, happy, well-adjusted (okay maybe I’m taking it a little far here) little boy! I had high hopes that he would really do well in kindergarten this year. He still has problems staying focused, but he really works hard on this!

When Sandis’s teacher mentioned that I should take him to the dr. to have him evaluated and possibly treated for hyperactivity disorder, I felt like I had been punched in the gut. I felt like I had failed. I felt like WE had failed, both Sandis and I. The next thing that happened is that my guards went up. Sandis and I have worked very hard and seen great improvement with his actions and impulsivity, and I REFUSE to let a teacher DIAGNOSE him and I REFUSE to fall prey to the growing trend of medicating every active child in the American universe.

I believe that Sandis has been blessed with passion and energy. I believe that what the teacher finds disconcerting and a trial in her class now is what will eventually be a truly valuable trait of my son’s. I do not want to take this away from him! I want to teach him how to function with the gifts and blessings that God has given him. I think we ALL know that not every gift and blessing in our life is always easy to have! My children are blessings, but they challenge me every day! I believe that medicating Sandis to make him more “acceptable” to his teacher would be denying him this awesome gift that God has given him. In his good moments, Sandis’s energy and passion will lift your heart. In his bad moments, they will make your ears blow steam. That is my son, that is who he is!
Beyond my frustrations with my virtual diagnosis of ADHD from Sandis’s teacher, I have also been putting a lot of thought into Sandis’s actions lately and when he is most reactive and seemingly most out of control. I’ve noticed that Sandis is EXTREMELY sensitive to noises. He is also sensitive to lights (fluorescent especially), some smells, and especially sensitive to motion around him. If there is too much noise, light, movement, smell in any one environment, he literally cannot “bring himself down” or “center” himself. It is like he can’t think beyond the sensory stimulation. I see this, and I recognize that perhaps there is a problem here. I have to recognize this because he is my son and I KNOW that there are certain places and situations that my son just cannot tolerate. I have made provisions to deal with Sandis’s sensory sensitivity in my daily life and actions, but how would his teachers and the school staff know to do this? I also believe that Sandis may SEEM ADHD to his teacher, but I really don’t think that ADHD fits my son. I think his teacher is wrong.

I called the ADHD pediatric psychiatry clinic at the University of Minnesota on Friday. I talked with a psychologist there who has agreed to see Sandis and evaluate him for ADHD and the many things that are often misdiagnosed as ADHD. This clinic also has a medical doctor and a psychiatrist. They are equipped to not screen patients with the intent to diagnose ADHD, but with the intent to truly find out what is causing the child’s problems, whether those problems are medical, psychological, nutritional, etc…..The psychiatrist did tell me, after our conversation, that from what I described, Sandis did not seem to fit a traditional ADHD profile, and that we would talk more when I see him at our appointment. I scheduled for October 19th so I’ll keep everyone updated!

There is also the possibility that my son is an active/alert personality young man who has enough energy that he could certainly spare some to his classmates! Thus far, Sandis’s learning has not been impaired by what the teacher has called attention problems. We DO have a behavior intervention meeting planned with a behavior interventionist at the school on October 25th. I am scared of what the future will bring us, but I am willing to do whatever it takes to make my son’s school experience as good as it can be. And honestly, it doesn’t have to be at THIS school with THIS teacher that that happens!