Health care is a basic human right, not a privilege. For some reason, we’ve allowed ourselves as Americans to be fooled into accepting that one must be blessed with “means” to actuate appropriate health care. As a nation we have failed to realize that our health care system is a barometer of our society’s value for human life.

-Me

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

What Gives?

I have too much stuff to do. It is time to start paring things down because my life is becoming ridiculous.

I have two jobs. I have my main job. This job is 8-4:30 Monday through Friday with health insurance bookooo benefits job. Very Important Job. My second job is acting as a caretaker for the building I live in. It pays (if that’s what you want to call it) a $250 rent credit per month.

If you have ever had to tweak your budget, you KNOW, that 250 bucks is 250 bucks. There is no way up, down, behind or around it. That’s a lot of space to add to a budget.

In keeping with this twosy thing I have going with my jobs (2), my kids (2), but not my boyfriend (just 1), I also have two budgets. The first budget is my money budget. I never get excited about it because I never have anything left in it. My “other” budget is my time. Depending on the day, one budget is more pliable than the other. The thing about my time budget, though, is that there is a finite amount of time I have. I have so many hours in the day and that is that. I can’t try to find a better job that pays me more time, and I can’t bargain with the sun and moon to crack in an extra hour in the 24hour per day cycle that is established.

There is a thin line where the money and time budget meet (and piss and moan at each other I imagine as well). Usually the money budget stomps all over the time budget. I don’t have the time but I need the money, so I stomp on the time and everyone who is close to me (including me!) suffers because of it. If I take liberties with my time budget occasionally my money budget suffers, but normally due to the fact that I have to dedicate so much of my time accomplishing the essentials of the money budget, if I fudge my time budget my time budget suffers in turn. It’s a nasty game we play, us budgeters.

So I am faced with a problem. A.Serious.Time.Budget.Problem.

My time budget has been permanently altered. There is no going back to the budget I had before. I must accept these changes. Changes (in shortened format, like the 1040EZ) are as follows:
1. Therapy appointments – twice a week – after work
2. Home Therapy programs – every day all the time, every 1-1/2 hours and also as needed
3. Support Group – Twice a month, after work, after a therapy appointment (FREE CHILDCARE WOOT!)
4. IEP meetings & preschool special education assessments – Whenever they can manage to get 10 professionals all in the same room at once, I have to be there. No budging on this one. During Work Hours.
5. Home Medication – Constant but short, not very time consuming but is a rabid emotion consumer and causes time to feel more pressed than it is, or as pressing as it really is.
6. Specialist Appointments – Drs Drs Drs – Psychologist, Psychiatrist, Endocrinologist, Rheumatologist, blah blah blah blah blah. Psychologist every other week, during work hours. Psychiatrist once every three months an hour and a half away during work hours. Endocrinologist every three months an hour and a half away during work hours. Rheumatologist (I don’t know yet)…..
7. County Mental Health Social Worker Appointments – Before work or after work twice a month, coordinate care and acts as advocate
8. Work.On.Saturdays.To.Make.Up.Time.Missed

So what do I do? Can I honestly expect to add all of this without taking anything away? How do I take something away? What do I change? Even if I do, CAN I AFFORD IT (Damn stupid money budget).

I don’t know and I’m trying not to care.

So, do you want to know what I’ve tentatively decided to do?

Bye Bye $250 Bucks………..

I’m no longer the woman of two’s. Beginning in March, I will be the woman of onesies. One Job. One Daughter. One Son. One Boyfriend.

One.

God Help Me.

5 comments:

Scott K. Johnson said...

Hey Sarah,

A hard $250 to swallow, but we always find a way to make things work.

The time and less responsibilities will benefit your time budget so much - it will be well worth it. Plus, unloading the stress of "Oh crap, I still have to clean (or whatever)" is a benefit too.

Here's to wishing a big raise in your future!

Chrissie in Belgium said...

I think you are making the right decision! Gosh Sarah I am at a total loss of what to say/suggest - life can definitely be a bummer!

MileMasterSarah said...

Chrissie,
Thanks for the feedback! I think it is the right decision as well. I don't think it is a bummer though, I actually think it is a relief. I feel so good knowing that come March this is off my plate. I can work out the money stuff. I think I finally just had to realize that God will provide, even if I don't have this rent credit!

Molly said...

Sarah.
Hang in there. It's hard to accept, but everything happens for a reason.
Thinking about you and the kids.

Amberthyme said...

jSarah,
I read this post and then your previous one again.You Can Do It!

If I can become "Master Letter Writer" you can become Master of Time & Money! I know I'm being a little silly but I hope this gives you at least a little bit of extra time that you need for your kids and yourself. I'm still looking for that time-travel device - if you find it let me know)